Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay
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Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay

Being an author here at YOB requires me to have homosexual attractions on some level, in some manner or another. That’s kind of our purpose here — to be men on the inside of this issue, telling stories of how we experience the world and go through life without giving in to our homosexual urges. […]

Questioning My Friend’s Sexuality
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Questioning My Friend’s Sexuality

This is my third post featuring the wild ride of my friendship with Jake. Check out Part 1 and Part 2. After Jake started trusting me, he opened up and shared his inner thoughts and difficult past experiences. I began to wonder if he was same-sex attracted when he talked about not having a girlfriend. […]

When the Attractive Cashier is More Than an Attractive Cashier
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When the Attractive Cashier is More Than an Attractive Cashier

I’ve started fixating on an attractive cashier at a local grocery store. He’s the first thing I look for when the doors whoosh open. My heart drops if I don’t see him, and it drops even further when I do. I talk about A.C. often. I bring him up with my roommates, and I mention him to […]

My Friend’s Baggage Affects Me
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My Friend’s Baggage Affects Me

This is the second post featuring my rocky friendship with Jake; check out Part 1. After I let Jake sleep on my couch for a few days, he went back to his parents’ house. We remained in contact. I knew he was trouble, but I saw something in him that made me want to befriend […]

To Love A Woman
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To Love A Woman

“Are you dating anyone?” “Are there any girls you’re interested in?” “Who’s got your attention?” These questions were often asked of me in high school. Though I was very aware that guys in their teens were supposed to be interested in the female species, I was hardly conscious of them. I pretended to be fascinated by […]

I’ve Never Wanted to Have Sex with Another Man
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I’ve Never Wanted to Have Sex with Another Man

In all my years of wrestling with same-sex attraction — a physical and emotional attraction I can trace back to first grade — not once have I ever sought out or even remotely desired sex with another man. Deep breath. I realize and must certainly clarify that my story is my story alone. I can’t […]

What I’ve Learned Since Getting Married
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What I’ve Learned Since Getting Married

I have struggled with writing this post for over a month now. This was supposed to be a continuation of my last post, sharing what I’ve learned from the turmoil I’ve faced since getting married back in 2009. But after writing and then rewriting everything, and then deleting it all, then wondering what the heck […]

YOBcast Episode 007: Attraction
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YOBcast Episode 007: Attraction

What is attraction? Are there variations among physical, emotional, and spiritual attraction — let alone for one gender over another? Join Tom, Elliott, Sam, John, and Will for a lively roundtable discussion on all things relating to attraction. It’s a broad topic, and we cover as much ground as we can within the hour — […]

Would I Still Have Same-Sex Attraction If…?
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Would I Still Have Same-Sex Attraction If…?

One of my favorite pieces of music is an obscure orchestral piece by Charles Ives called, “The Unanswered Question.” Written at the beginning of the 20th century, it truly feels as though a solo trumpet is asking a question that can never be fully answered. The trumpet hangs in the air, always waiting for the […]

Getting Married … with Same-Sex Attraction
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Getting Married … with Same-Sex Attraction

When I was eighteen, God told me that I would get married one day. I said okay. When I was nineteen, I started making out with my best friend / codependent. Then he and I broke up. When I was twenty, I was fully aware of my homosexual cravings and had no attraction to women […]