My Straight Friend Was Emotionally Dependent on Me
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My Straight Friend Was Emotionally Dependent on Me

Emotional dependency. Such a fun topic. Many of us SSA (same-sex attracted) brothers know the terminology all too well. We long for human connection with our gender. We feel like no other man understands us. 

No one wants to be near us. No one wants to know us. No one wants to be our friend. […]

YOBcast Episode 022: Living Together
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YOBcast Episode 022: Living Together

Can same-sex attracted guys live together? Is there ever any physical/sexual temptation? Aren’t there at least heavy emotional issues living in the same house? Tom, Elliott, and Bradley gather to discuss one of our most often asked questions: how do you three SSA guys live together in the same house? It’s an enlightening hour of […]

Not Interested in a New Machismo
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Not Interested in a New Machismo

Walking into manhood has felt less like an epic saga and more like stumbling drunkenly and blindly through the valley of death and dying. I tried to find my strength, fortitude, and the path to manhood on my own; years later, I still come up short. My feelings of inadequacy pointed to where I was […]

I Don’t Want My New Friend to Leave Me
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I Don’t Want My New Friend to Leave Me

I met my new friend, Henry, about a year ago. Great guy, my age, married with a daughter slightly older than mine — he was literally another me as far as life situations go. My prayer for connection with someone in my exact life state was placed on a silver platter in my church. In […]

My Church Supports My True Calling
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My Church Supports My True Calling

Moments shape our lives. Stephen Sondheim wrote in his show, Into the Woods: Oh, if life were made of moments Even now and then a bad one! But if life were only moments Then you’d never know you had one. My life has had some incredible moments. The moment I met my wife. The moment my daughter […]

When Should I Hug Another Guy?
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When Should I Hug Another Guy?

Like many other guys who deal with same-sex attraction, I really appreciate affection expressed by physical touch. Especially hugs. For me, hugs are never sexual — just a way to show Christian love. But not all guys feel comfortable hugging another guy. So, when should I hug another guy or a male friend? The answer […]

Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay
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Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay

Being an author here at YOB requires me to have homosexual attractions on some level, in some manner or another. That’s kind of our purpose here — to be men on the inside of this issue, telling stories of how we experience the world and go through life without giving in to our homosexual urges. […]

What Every SSA Guy Needs
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What Every SSA Guy Needs

His question was an honest one. No ill intentions, no wild presuppositions. Simply put: a curiosity stemming from lack of education. More in passing than direct, a side statement within a side statement. But it was still a question. And it had to be answered. Why do SSA guys need strong male friendships? My friend Mick […]

YOBcast Episode 014: Emotional Dependency, Part 2
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YOBcast Episode 014: Emotional Dependency, Part 2

How do we endure the weightiness of emotional dependency, and how do we move beyond our emotional dependency? The conversation continues in the second part of this two-part episode on emotional dependency, featuring Tom, Elliott, Marshall, Corey, and Bradley. In this episode, Tom, Elliott, and Marshall share their personal stories of emotional dependency, and we discuss […]

YOBcast Episode 013: Emotional Dependency, Part 1
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YOBcast Episode 013: Emotional Dependency, Part 1

What is emotional dependency? How do we avoid falling emotionally dependent on another man for our survival, and how do we recover when we cross that line? It’s the first in a two-part episode on emotional dependency — or “emodep,” as we so lovingly call it. Join Tom and Elliott along with Corey, Marshall, and […]