Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay
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Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay

Being an author here at YOB requires me to have homosexual attractions on some level, in some manner or another. That’s kind of our purpose here — to be men on the inside of this issue, telling stories of how we experience the world and go through life without giving in to our homosexual urges. […]

Male Nudity Will Fix Me
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Male Nudity Will Fix Me

I’ve written about my childhood fascination with nudity and how it led me into the nudist world, making me act out my sexual insecurities. I’d go even deeper into the world of nudism, thinking it’d be the solution to my problems. While I did have a strongly sexual fascination with male nudity, I figured it […]

Discovering the Heart of My Nudist Desires
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Discovering the Heart of My Nudist Desires

In the first installment of this series, I described the beginnings of my long and complicated relationship with nudity. Entering high school, my love/hate relationship with nudity became more complicated . . . I grew fascinated by the thought of naked men and being naked with them but also terrified at the same time. My […]

My Complicated Relationship with Nudity
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My Complicated Relationship with Nudity

My only friend in elementary school had a neighborhood friend named Jeffrey. As he and I sat at the table talking about who knows what, he piped up with a story. “One time,” he said, “the three of us were playing truth or dare. We dared Jeffrey’s little brother to strip naked and run around […]

My Father Doesn’t Know Me
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My Father Doesn’t Know Me

I had a great childhood. I grew up in a Christian home with stable, loving parents who raised my brother and me to love the Lord, leading us in daily morning Bible studies. They both had somewhat difficult childhoods themselves and, as most parents do, they wanted to give their sons a better start in life than […]

YOBcast Episode 010: Hookups & Gay Sex
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YOBcast Episode 010: Hookups & Gay Sex

Why do we hook up with other men? What draws us to cross that line? And what happens in the aftermath of gay sex? Tom, Elliott, and Matt come together for a vulnerable conversation on their varied experiences in hookup culture. This episode cuts deep. If you enjoy our show and haven’t yet done so, […]

I’ve Never Wanted to Have Sex with Another Man
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I’ve Never Wanted to Have Sex with Another Man

In all my years of wrestling with same-sex attraction — a physical and emotional attraction I can trace back to first grade — not once have I ever sought out or even remotely desired sex with another man. Deep breath. I realize and must certainly clarify that my story is my story alone. I can’t […]

Let’s Talk About Penis Size
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Let’s Talk About Penis Size

When I was about ten or eleven years old, I showed my brother my penis. He was talking on the phone, and I wanted to freak him out and disrupt his conversation. I meant it entirely as a joke. In fact, I did this a few times whenever he got on the phone with somebody. […]

Resetting My Brain with Naked Men
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Resetting My Brain with Naked Men

I’ve been purging a bit for the past year or so, getting a lot of junk out of my life that doesn’t need to be there. Christians do this all the time, but most of the time, we think of it in terms of sin; we purge our lives of sin and bad habits that […]

I Want to Masturbate with Other Guys
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I Want to Masturbate with Other Guys

One of my biggest lusts and longest lasting fantasies has been to masturbate with other guys. Not have sex with them, not experience any kind of touching or penetration whatsoever — just jack off together, in full view of each other, with no shame, as casually as we would watch TV or fold laundry. While I […]