Eugene Peterson, Same-Sex Marriage, and Feeling Invisible in the Church
Posted by
Posted in

Eugene Peterson, Same-Sex Marriage, and Feeling Invisible in the Church

Eugene Peterson — pastor, author of The Message paraphrase Bible — recently made waves in the Christian world. First, he “affirmed” same-sex marriage, then he backtracked, still claiming to believe in “biblical marriage.” LifeWay threatened to pull his books from their stores if he didn’t align his beliefs with theirs, and a day later he did. […]

Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay
Posted by
Posted in

Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay

Being an author here at YOB requires me to have homosexual attractions on some level, in some manner or another. That’s kind of our purpose here — to be men on the inside of this issue, telling stories of how we experience the world and go through life without giving in to our homosexual urges. […]

Real Men Mow Their Own Lawns
Posted by
Posted in

Real Men Mow Their Own Lawns

I hate mowing my lawn. Hate it with a passion. This is not an exaggeration either. If I could, I would have solid gravel all around my house. That, or a magical lawn fairy who would keep my lawn looking pristine without my ever having to lift a finger. Since the lawn fairy still ignores […]

YOBcast Episode 016: Gay Perceptions, Part 1
Posted by
Posted in

YOBcast Episode 016: Gay Perceptions, Part 1

What does it mean to “sound gay” or “look gay”? Is there anything “wrong” with our gay perceptions, should we learn to be comfortable with our gay perceptions, or should we seek to evolve beyond our gay perceptions? We’re back on track with our bimonthly podcast schedule! In the first of this two-part episode, Tom […]

The First Guy Who Ever Held My Hand
Posted by
Posted in

The First Guy Who Ever Held My Hand

Years ago, back when I’d first delved into the world of online SSA friendships, I got to talking with another SSA guy in my area. We commented on each other’s blogs, we friended each other on Facebook, and we traded phone numbers, too. He intimidated me, this guy: attractive and charming and, most of all, […]

My Complicated Relationship with Nudity
Posted by
Posted in

My Complicated Relationship with Nudity

My only friend in elementary school had a neighborhood friend named Jeffrey. As he and I sat at the table talking about who knows what, he piped up with a story. “One time,” he said, “the three of us were playing truth or dare. We dared Jeffrey’s little brother to strip naked and run around […]

My Greatest Fear in Coming Out
Posted by
Posted in

My Greatest Fear in Coming Out

I’m so tired of it all: living two lives isn’t something I can maintain while also living a thriving life. Picking and choosing what I do and what I talk about whether I’m “out” to the person I’m with is terribly exhausting. My last post spoke of a time I overcame my fear and opened up […]

Growing Up as a Pastor’s Kid with SSA
Posted by
Posted in

Growing Up as a Pastor’s Kid with SSA

Childhood plays a very significant part in our lives. How we’re raised defines us in adulthood, paving the way toward how we interact with people: family, friends, churches, co-workers, or strangers. Father figures especially shaped our lives. Truth be told, none of us had a perfect father growing up. Some of us grew up in […]

YOBcast Episode 013: Emotional Dependency, Part 1
Posted by
Posted in

YOBcast Episode 013: Emotional Dependency, Part 1

What is emotional dependency? How do we avoid falling emotionally dependent on another man for our survival, and how do we recover when we cross that line? It’s the first in a two-part episode on emotional dependency — or “emodep,” as we so lovingly call it. Join Tom and Elliott along with Corey, Marshall, and […]

My Greatest Failure as a Man
Posted by
Posted in

My Greatest Failure as a Man

I am a failure. I’m a failure of a husband and a man. No, I didn’t cheat on my wife; I feel like I’ve done the opposite of it, actually. I’ve been wearing this feeling for awhile. A long time, really. Ever since we got married. When my life turned around many, many years ago, […]