Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay
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Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay

Being an author here at YOB requires me to have homosexual attractions on some level, in some manner or another. That’s kind of our purpose here — to be men on the inside of this issue, telling stories of how we experience the world and go through life without giving in to our homosexual urges. […]

Giving My Kids the Sex Talk
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Giving My Kids the Sex Talk

Daddy, how are babies made? I was sitting on my living room floor with my three kids while my wife was out when my six-year-old daughter asked me this question. There was no real motivation for it — simply a thought that had popped into her mind. Nevertheless, I think she had been wondering about […]

Male Nudity Will Fix Me
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Male Nudity Will Fix Me

I’ve written about my childhood fascination with nudity and how it led me into the nudist world, making me act out my sexual insecurities. I’d go even deeper into the world of nudism, thinking it’d be the solution to my problems. While I did have a strongly sexual fascination with male nudity, I figured it […]

Questioning My Friend’s Sexuality
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Questioning My Friend’s Sexuality

This is my third post featuring the wild ride of my friendship with Jake. Check out Part 1 and Part 2. After Jake started trusting me, he opened up and shared his inner thoughts and difficult past experiences. I began to wonder if he was same-sex attracted when he talked about not having a girlfriend. […]

My Struggles Like Substance Abuse
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My Struggles Like Substance Abuse

I remember the first time I saw Jake at my front door. I’d gotten a call from a high school student I had tutored, and that student had sent him to me because Jake was 18 and his parents had just thrown him out of the house. He thought I might give Jake a place […]

Accountability Doesn’t Work
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Accountability Doesn’t Work

Growing up in the church, I learned that any problem with lust, porn, or masturbation could be alleviated with good accountability. The primary reason I remained entangled by these sexual vices was that I didn’t have enough accountability in my life. The more accountability I had, the more divine freedom would be made available to me […]

YOBcast Episode 010: Hookups & Gay Sex
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YOBcast Episode 010: Hookups & Gay Sex

Why do we hook up with other men? What draws us to cross that line? And what happens in the aftermath of gay sex? Tom, Elliott, and Matt come together for a vulnerable conversation on their varied experiences in hookup culture. This episode cuts deep. If you enjoy our show and haven’t yet done so, […]

Sex Isn’t Enough
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Sex Isn’t Enough

“If you want to stop me, now is the time.” My cold hands gripped the steering wheel tight. My vision tunneled toward an unknown destination. With each short breath, my broken heart rattled around my ribcage. This was it. The moment I would finally cross the forbidden line. I was on my way to a stranger’s […]

I’ve Never Wanted to Have Sex with Another Man
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I’ve Never Wanted to Have Sex with Another Man

In all my years of wrestling with same-sex attraction — a physical and emotional attraction I can trace back to first grade — not once have I ever sought out or even remotely desired sex with another man. Deep breath. I realize and must certainly clarify that my story is my story alone. I can’t […]

I No Longer Want to Leave My Family for a Boyfriend
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I No Longer Want to Leave My Family for a Boyfriend

I stayed with my wife and our daughter in China for six months. Together. For those six months, I struggled with SSA, loving my wife, being sexual with a woman, and accepting my new roles as husband and father. It’s not that I didn’t love my wife — I did truly love her — but […]