His profile definitely made him seem like the modern, ideal, "manly man." He was a jock type with many photos of himself playing baseball. He also stated drawing as one of his hobbies, just like me. A straight masculine dude who plays sports, likes drawing, and calls himself a Christian? Perfect!
He was never physically affectionate; we’d never even hugged. I wanted to touch him not out of a sexual desire but from a longing to connect with him as love with a brother. I dreamed of a day when we could embrace and confess our brotherly love for each other. I put my hand on his shoulder once. He brushed it off.
I couldn't be like these people. They seemed like the antithesis of everything I stood for. Finding out that the Bible forbade homosexual sex only fueled my self-righteous anger. To assert my masculinity and avoid being labeled gay at all costs, I joined my other straight male classmates in mocking gay people.
I've cuddled with many fantastic men, all same-sex attracted. I can say with absolute certainty that these moments have been some of the most beautiful, moving, and totally platonic expressions of intimate love. I'd recommend reading these basic pointers based on my own past experiences with bro cuddling.
Most of these cuddling experiences transcend the physical and begin to feel more spiritual. We aren’t just touching bodies; we’re touching souls.
The shame over my SSA made me feel that I was something evil, repulsive, and unlovable. My loneliness and lack of friends seemed to prove it.
I've talked to a lot of people about this rejection and they've all said they don't quite understand the rejection and couldn't see anything I'd done wrong.
The other guys told me about the Korean spa and how those experiences helped them. This sounded like something right down my alley.
We decided to go to a nudist resort. My first trip to a nudist resort! Maybe I'd form a good, close friendship with the guy I was about to meet?
What if I did partake in male nudity in a non-sexual setting? What if I could make my nudist desires feel more normal and less of a sexual fantasy?