We welcome back Marshall to talk more about his unique home life: a 20-acre farm, living alongside 23 people in a central house, cabins, tiny houses, and RV’s. How has Marshall enjoyed living alone in the past, and did he second-guess living with younger single men as an older single man? How did Marshall’s many living situations over six decades lead to his buying this farm, and what’s joyful and also challenging about leading such an intentional community of believers?
We kick off a new summer series, AT HOME: how our current life stages and living situations impact our faith, sexuality, and masculinity. Join us each episode for a new member of our YOB community sharing his story from various life stages and living situations. We start with our “plain old gay” Matt, who has been living with other gay men, both affirming and traditional, after 15 years of living by himself. We learn Matt’s home environment growing up, including how that shaped his view of what the future would look like. What have been the joys and challenges of sharing his current and recent homes with other gay men, and what does he think of the “optics” of having fellow gay roommates, if anything at all?
Harrison Bly joins the show to discuss masculine friendship! Harrison is a member of our YOBBERS community and the author of Bent on Men, a book recently featured in our monthly YOBBERS Book Club. Both Tom and Harrison reference their books, sharing what happens after some pivotal friendships change, fizzle, or even disintegrate entirely after the final page. They discuss the friendship dynamics of connecting with straight men as well as fellow "Side B" men. What are the challenges or even road blocks to forming various male friendships? And what do we do with this loneliness epidemic which has hit men hard?
The other person thinks it's an accidental-turned-whimsical exchange, when in fact it's quite deliberate and nefarious. This Last Week Tonight episode details people who were scammed financially because they thought they were building a legitimate, longer-term relationship with this conversational or otherwise caring person on the other line. It's tragic how susceptible people can be to potential love. I know I am.
Simon joins the show from faraway Britain as our first native UK YOBBER! He tells us about his life in Oxfordshire, including a cat and his very own "flat." Tom bonds with Simon over their shared experiences in Oxford, including the very same bedroom. Simon gives us a lovely list of Britishisms, including the definition of a "yob." He also shares some of his story with faith and sexuality, enlightening us about Side B life from a non-American country. We also have an exciting update on the European YOBBERS retreat taking place later this year!
Do I fast because I truly desire to hear from Him more clearly, walk with Him more closely, and feel less spiritually cloudy? Or do I fast because, well, it's comfortable to be uncomfortable? Because it almost feels good to deprive, if not punish my body – particularly after I sin?
Daniel returns to pitch this summer's special gathering of YOBBERS – in Europe! He joins Tom to discuss a smaller-scale retreat or "holiday" somewhere in the Mediterranean, inviting all who are interested to email him ASAP. Daniel also catches us up on his life in London – including the exciting news that he is now a British citizen! He tells us about one country where he's already traveled with his new passport, as well as another on the horizon to see a certain female pop star perform.
Once upon a time I wrote about five times I've felt like a man. As we wind down the theme of "Love Month" at YOB, I started thinking about some instances when my heart has swelled, or exploded, or some other symphonic verb meant to translate the depths of safety, care, and affection I've experienced with other men. This isn't a "top 5" or hardly exhaustive list, but these are five stories that come to mind...
First-time guest Andrew joins Tom to discuss Netflix’s "Heartstopper"! It’s a queer coming-of-age show that many in our YOB community have enjoyed, though its depictions of queer romance could also be distracting for some (nothing sexual in the first two seasons, just lots of same-sex kissing). We discuss what we loved from the characters in romantic pairings to the loyal friendships that ultimately reinforce this show. We devote our remaining time to the show’s lone asexual character as two people in YOB who identify as asexual ourselves. What did we resonate with in this character, and where was the disconnect?
Tom’s straight younger brother Andy returns for his yearly appearance on the podcast to educate us on this year’s Super Bowl matchup between the Chiefs and 49ers! We also dive into all the T-Swift and Travis Kelce storylines, including the often loud objections to their media coverage. Is toxic masculinity out of control?!