BLOG ARCHIVE

We generally blog once or twice weekly. Check back regularly for new posts, or dive into our archive!

  • We Need a New Masculine Narrative
    We Need a New Masculine Narrative
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    When we talk about masculinity, we usually talk like it is something we need to become, instead of something we already are. I think we need to introduce a new masculine narrative: a new narrative that is actually an old one, formed by
  • Nature vs. Nurture: Was I Born This Way?
    Nature vs. Nurture: Was I Born This Way?
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    It's only human nature to ask these questions of nature vs. nurture. The seeming injustice and sheer unfairness of our sexualities can feel torturous. It seems cruel that we're so different in a way that society considers taboo and the church considers downright
  • The First Guy I Ever Crossed Physical Boundaries With
    The First Guy I Ever Crossed Physical Boundaries With
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    I pictured him crying in his bed when he woke up that morning, or even going to bed crying right after leaving me; knowing I'd hurt him, knowing I'd been the one to cross physical boundaries. It destroyed me, if I'm
  • Coming Out to My Church Small Group
    Coming Out to My Church Small Group
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    I'd spent a long time laboriously looking for a community to belong, and I'd finally found one. With this new community, though, came a growing fear – the fear of eventually being rejected. If they knew me, like really knew me, would they still want to be friends with me or even associate with me at all? If these people were to reject me for my sexuality, I thought, it would be better to experience that rejection now by just ripping off the bandage rather than going deeper into relationships that would only be taken away
  • Coming Out to My Parents as a Teenager
    Coming Out to My Parents as a Teenager
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    A few days prior, I had sent my dad an email explaining that I was gay. I can't remember what all I said or how I said it, but looking back, that probably wasn't the best way to go about it. I was just too afraid to bring it up face to face; an email was easy to send. Hitting send on that coming out email to my dad felt like being pushed out of a plane: there was no turning back, and the parachute better well
  • When I Get Lost in My Loneliness
    When I Get Lost in My Loneliness
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    Well, 2020 happened. And in this "unprecedented" year, a more personal disease revealed itself in me. Like Nouwen wrote, despite my being around people during a pandemic, I faced loneliness. My tendency to isolate combined with an actual, physical inability to connect with others made me look deeper into the why of my
  • Seeing Myself in the Secret of Crossdressing in "Ed Wood"
    Seeing Myself in the Secret of Crossdressing in “Ed Wood”
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    My teenage self saw a lot of me in Ed Wood. I may not have ever wanted to crossdress, but I still held my own big secret with homosexuality. I identified with this concept of struggling with a secret which society considers
  • To My Significant Other: A Template to Help You Come Out to Her
    To My Significant Other: A Template to Help You Come Out to Her
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    I am attracted to other men. At this point, you might be shocked, scared, angry, or confused. Please allow me to affirm a few truths before I continue. I love Jesus, I believe in a traditional/biblical sexual ethic, and I am pursuing holiness before the Lord in my sexuality. I love you and want to walk well with you. I want you to know this about me so you can see me, love me, and walk well with me, and so I am not holding back pieces of my life from
  • The Danger of Modesty Talks for Men and Women
    The Danger of Modesty Talks for Men and Women
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    In both youth groups and camp ministry, I received the modesty talk on countless occasions. They all had the same basic outline. Our bodies are a temple; we need to keep the temple pure. Anything sexual outside of marriage will dirty the temple. Men are lustful and visual creatures. Women are not as visual and do not deal with lust. I accepted this teaching wholesale. I knew that I was visual, saw my sexuality as a dirty thing, and kept on trying to fight back lust. But I began to notice some problems with modesty
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