It's not just that I never had a childhood best friend; it's that I'll never have a childhood best friend. That era has come and gone, that chapter closed.
My gay brother had been burned. What started as seemingly harmless sexual experiments ended as an out-of-control obsession that literally killed my brother.
I longed to be someone else. To not have to carry the burden of different. It was so heavy. I soon began to pursue perfection. Not because I wanted to, but because it was demanded of me.