A Man Like All the Other Men?
I recently returned from a men’s retreat in which I came face-to-face with my biggest struggle: not anything regarding my sexuality or sexual addictions. But simply feeling like a man. Like a man among men, assembled on an equal playing field rather than somewhere on another field’s sidelines.
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How God Provided in My Midlife Loneliness
Arriving at my new house, I found no one there to greet me. I knew where my new housemates hid the key, so I let myself in. My emotions were almost more than I could take: fear, loneliness, and confusion.
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Coming Out at College
College held the hope for a fresh start. Home meant the weight of my double-life: the pain of lying about porn and “everything is okay” all the time; the great friendships that never felt deep or authentic enough for my broken self.
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Singleness in a Silhouette
We finished the day by taking silhouette pictures with the blazing orange-and-pink sky as our backdrop. My siblings lovingly kissed their spouses and lifted them up in the air as some of the most romantic and precious images I’d ever witnessed. I stayed to watch for a little while, knowing that no one would ask me if I wanted any pictures by myself. That would have been absurd, right? It didn’t take long for me to reach the end of what I could handle with my family. So, I ran away.
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My Midlife Move 3,000 Miles Away
I was single with no children, free from almost all responsibility, and I realized I could move anywhere in the country and totally start over if I wanted it. The idea appealed to me the more I thought about it.
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The Joys and Sorrows of Being an Introvert
I hated being the awkward, quiet introvert; I wanted to be like the energetic, chatty, extroverted kids. They always seemed to make a bajillion friends and were always the life of the party who people laughed at and enjoyed. I hated myself for not having charisma or speaking when it mattered. I thought something was wrong with me.
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My Jesus Journey Leads Me Here
Call it a “new direction” or a clearer translation of what YOB has been from the start: a community desperate for Jesus. My 31-year Jesus journey leads me here. Wherever “here” is. Broken on the floor. Echoes of the past ringing in my ears. Doubts for the future always shadowing my vision no matter how many tears I blink away.
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A Challenge to Our YOB Readers
So, I’m gonna take a break from my usual stories to talk about something I’ve been observing in the recent posts and comments. The reason why we write about some topics, whether it be Dean’s complimenting the LGBT+ community, or our discussing Pride Month, or Will’s enjoying Queer Eye is because we see a need in the LGBT+ community for Jesus! The LGBT+ community is the only safe place where many gay people can be themselves, because we chased them there. We see that, but some here don’t want to admit it!
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Can Christians Celebrate Pride Month?
June is recognized as LGBT+ Pride Month. It’s a divisive topic in church culture! Should Christians celebrate Pride Month? Should we in this YOB community recognize Pride Month or even attend a Pride parade? Our core authors gathered to talk about Pride Month — our response to it as Christians and particularly as believers with same-sex attraction (SSA).
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Unearthing the Courage to Love
These men, their stories showed me the courage to love. The courage to love family and friends, whether they understand, accept us, or not. The courage to love and trust God even in the midst of confusion and lies. The courage to love myself.
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