About The Author

Thomas Mark Zuniga

Chronic wanderer and melancholic delighter in the what-comes-next. I'm YOB's cofounder and editor, and I also host our podcast. I've written a couple books and first started fleshing out my story of faith and same-sex attraction years ago under the Xanga username "Two Beckonings." I'm an INFJ, Enneagram Type 4, and my favorite place is the one where coffee and vulnerability meet. Feel free to reach out if we've yet to connect; maybe it was ever ago planned that we one day would?

YOBcast Episode 056: Pornography

Do we talk about pornography too much as the Church or not nearly enough? Do we “talk about talking about” pornography or do we actually talk about it? Pornography is more accessible than ever before and, increasingly, more aggressive. It’s a struggle and an addiction that has reached and claimed all people: gay, straight, men, and women. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob as we take a deep dive into the science and story of pornography. It’s one of our classic episodes that we’re reopening in a new way.

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YOBcast Episode 055: Mentors

In the spirit of resolutions, self-improvement, and growth in this new year, we’re talking about mentors: those wise, sage-like figures who guide us through this life. Tom, Ryan, and Jacob talk about their favorite mentors in books and movies, sharing some of their own mentorship experiences from years past. What qualities do all these figures share in common? We also discuss the concept of mentoring a new generation — including whether we feel we’re even capable of such a thing. It’s an awesome kickstart to a new year and a new decade as we recommit to producing two podcast episodes per month!

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YOBcast Episode 054: Holiday Singleness

It’s an undoubtedly difficult season for many in our community, and we talk about singleness during the holidays: the disconnect, the loneliness, and the finding of hope and joy when hope and joy may feel so far away. Tom, Ryan, and Jacob share their stories of holidays past and present, answering some listener questions along the way, including the concept of spending the holidays with chosen family versus blood family, and whether we’ve ever been asked if we’ve found that “special lady” yet.

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Thanksgiving is the Worst! And Also Yearlong.

It’s another edition of the Manly Monthly! Our recap of the month that was at Your Other Brothers and a dive into gratitude during what can be a hard holiday season. Also Tom waters his new plants and fights a wasp!

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I’m Just Not That Into Physical Touch Anymore

I actually find myself decreasingly needing — or even desiring — touch with other men. It’s not completely gone, mind you. But the need/desire is considerably less. This is a fairly new development. I’m still unpacking the reasons, but I have some theories based on how my male friendships have transpired the last decade — many of them imploding.

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YOBcast Episode 053: Brothers! w/ Jacob & Nate

Jacob’s older brother, Nate, joins us for a deep-dive into their relationship: how Jacob came out to his brother, Nate’s reaction as a straight guy, their parents’ dynamic, and their respective struggles with pornography. It’s a cinematic storytelling session full of laughs and tearful takes alike. Beyond their brotherly story, we get to know Nate (including his personality styles and love languages), learn about Nate’s friendship with Tom, and partake in a “brotherly bridge” all about capris. Yes, capris — the pant.

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MANLY MONTHLY PREMIERE!

We’re BACK! Introducing our new (totally not old) video series: the MANLY MONTHLY! I talk the new series format and give some highlights of this past summer, including hosting our second YOBBERS retreat and attending the second Revoice conference. I also close with a quick dive into John 6 and why, above all other paths, Jesus is the one we’re following at YOB.

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Why I’m Attracted to Other Guys (and Who Cares?)

I’ve had at least a decade to process my sexuality, why certain men “do it” for me and why others do not. I’ve already written about what kinds of guys I’m attracted to and my cycles of physical and emotional same-sex attraction. But am I sexually attracted to men? The answer has become so clear over the last couple years: no.

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YOBcast Episode 052: Chosen Family

For better or worse, we all start with families of origin. But what of this concept of families of choice? A chosen family that goes beyond blood and DNA? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob for a discussion on chosen family: what it means for the LGBTQ+ community, what it means for believers, and what it means for this overlap of communities in YOB and beyond.

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When I’m Attracted to Other Guys

I’ve pretty much always been attracted to guys in one manner or another. Some times more obsessively and explicitly than others. Some times more emotionally than physically. And for whatever reason, never sexually.

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