About The Author

Thomas Mark Zuniga

Chronic wanderer and melancholic delighter in the what-comes-next. I'm YOB's cofounder and editor, and I also host our podcast. I've written a couple books and first started fleshing out my story of faith and same-sex attraction years ago under the Xanga username "Two Beckonings." I'm an INFJ, Enneagram Type 4, and my favorite place is the one where coffee and vulnerability meet. Feel free to reach out if we've yet to connect; maybe it was ever ago planned that we one day would?

YOBcast Episode 049: Letting Go

Pull up a chair as Tom talks about the recent decision to remove our first 39 podcast episodes. Join Tom, Ryan, Jacob, and Dean for a vulnerable conversation on letting go. Letting go of people, letting go of the past, and letting go of the future. Because if we can’t let go of old things, how can we ever let new things in? Before we dive into the nitty-gritty, we talk about Tom’s Lenten “masturbation cleanse,” his recent trip to a monastery, the “perfect friend date,” and possibly rebranding our new hit intro segment, “The Brother Beat”?

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The Last Ever Episode of Manly Monday?!

It’s the last Manly Monday ever! Or, wait, is it? Find out in this month’s video, where I also discuss the upcoming YOBBERS retreat, a church men’s retreat from which I just returned, the dreaded comparison game, and the prospect of encountering giants in our already promised land…

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YOBcast Episode 048: More Intimacy

What happens when intimacy with another fails to fulfill or runs out altogether? Can we ever ask for more intimacy? Can we trust again when intimacy is lost? Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob in the second of our two-part discussion on intimacy. We share more of our most meaningful intimacy stories, including how one particular moment with Ryan and Jacob is one for Tom’s intimacy “trophy case.”

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YOBcast Episode 047: Intimacy

Intimacy is scary, and intimacy is vulnerable. Intimacy can be shared or rejected. Intimacy is special and sacred, and intimacy is everyday. Intimacy is sexual and emotional, physical and spiritual. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob in the first of a two-part deep dive into intimacy. The brothers define intimacy, likening it to a fire, discussing the differences and nuances between intimacy and vulnerability. They also talk about their first forays into intimacy many years ago and what the cornerstone of their most intimate relationships has been.

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I’m Giving Up Masturbation for Lent

This Lent, I’m giving up masturbation. And I realize that might sound really wrong or off or like I clearly didn’t grow up in a liturgical tradition and have no idea how this Lent thing even works. But regardless. I’m doing it. I’m not masturbating for the next few weeks. It may not quite be a “fast” by technical, theological terms. But it’s a necessary refocusing.

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Sobering and Necessary: Our Response to “Boy Erased”

Several of our featured authors watched the film, Boy Erased. It’s based on the real-life story of Garrard Conley who wrote a memoir of the same name. Boy Erased follows a young man’s journey through reparative or conversion therapy, and it’s also a story of a mother’s and father’s relationships with their gay son. It’s a heavy film, and we debriefed it together in this extensive conversation.

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YOBcast Episode 046: Church Inclusion

Many SSA/LGBT+ people struggle to find inclusion in the church — a safe place at least, and a nurturing place at best. This episode, we bring a very special guest onto the show. His name is Matt, who among other claims to fame (which we waste little time diving into), also pastors at Ryan’s church and oversees Ryan’s ministry to non-straight people, Intersect. We dive into their ministry relationship and overarching friendship, also discussing with Dean issues of sexuality, singleness, safety, and nurture of sexual minorities in the church.

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