BLOG ARCHIVE

We generally blog once or twice weekly. Check back regularly for new posts, or dive into our archive!

  • Sick of Gay Men No Longer?
    Sick of Gay Men No Longer?
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    Frankly, all this relational turmoil boiled to the point that I thought: You know what? I'm sick of gay men. Tired of the super sensitive personalities, tired of the drama queens. Heck, the emotionless or stoic personalities of most straight men started to feel preferable to what I'd found lately with other gay/SSA men. Nonetheless, with our YOBBERS retreat coming up I needed to put aside my negativity as best I
  • To Unite and Cheer On One Another in Our Burdens
    To Unite and Cheer On One Another in Our Burdens
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    More than anything, though, what struck me about this year's retreat was a deep sense of unity. As I looked around the room of forty brothers, I considered how what unites us all is our crazy decision to make Jesus our everything – not just to follow Christ in a church on Sunday, but to take a devotion to Him into every single second of our
  • What Your Other Brothers is All About
    What Your Other Brothers is All About
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    I was anxious our "vibe" would be too new, too foreign, too strange, and too uncomfortable for too many people. Would the ratio just be off? Would our vibe be off after 27 months apart? Beyond logistics and numbers, I felt anxious about the purpose of this retreat more than either of our previous ones. It all goes back to that nebulous definition of YOB: what are we here
  • Oh What a YOBBERS Retreat!
    Oh What a YOBBERS Retreat!
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    We've returned from our once-again-annual YOBBERS retreat, and oh what a time we had. Over forty of our Patreon supporters drove and flew from around the United States as we converged for a wonderful weekend of laughs, tears, and stories aplenty. We'll be sharing some of those retreat stories on our blog and podcast in the weeks to
  • YOB on Summer Break!
    YOB on Summer Break!
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    It's the YOB days of summer, as they say. Normally we don't hold summer retreats, but 2020 (and 2021) have been anything but normal years. As such, because of our repeatedly rescheduled retreat next month, YOB will be taking a little summer
  • Rethinking Nudity and Cuddling with Other Men
    Rethinking Nudity and Cuddling with Other Men
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    It's now been three to four years since I've written those blogs on cuddling and nudity, and I've shared many cuddles since with guys I've met through YOB. But have any of my thoughts changed since I wrote those
  • To Where Do I Turn in the Church?
    To Where Do I Turn in the Church?
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    There is no one group that is "for" my existence as a celibate SSA Christian, nor is there a specific group "against" it. It can feel like I have no clear place to turn to in the Church, because every place is equally likely to attack some part of who I am or what I do. Meanwhile, all I strive to be is a sold out follower of
  • Internalized Homophobia Returns: Coming Out to My Church Team Leader
    Internalized Homophobia Returns: Coming Out to My Church Team Leader
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    Something came crashing into my mind when Peter asked me to be a team leader at church: a stream of familiar feelings, similar to the ones I felt the first time I had to come out. They were feelings of inadequacy; the line of thinking that I was in a somewhat state of sinfulness that compelled me to
  • Where Are My Celibate Straight Friends?
    Where Are My Celibate Straight Friends?
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    It seems the only celibate communities forming are only by fellow "Side B" gay Christians, done so out of necessity. That really bothers me. Don't misunderstand me: it is good for celibate gay Christians to form communities. What bothers me, though, is that those communities should have already been started by celibate straight
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