joy

YOB ConvoCast 098: Andy's Becoming a Father!
YOB ConvoCast 098: Andy’s Becoming a Father!
Tom's younger brother, Andy, returns to discuss something besides football! We discuss his impending fatherhood! He and his wife are due with their first child, a daughter, in just a few more months. What brings Andy joy, and what causes him anxiety about becoming a father for the first time? What's Tom's biggest anxiety for his coming niece? And what trait does Tom admire the most in a leader – particularly in a parent?
Affirmations for All at This Year's YOBBERS Retreat
Affirmations for All at This Year’s YOBBERS Retreat
So much of YOB life (and, indeed, Side B life in general) is in the unofficial "meetings"; by this, I mean all the conversations to/from retreats and conferences. It's in the downtime chats and interactions that spontaneously happen. This was driven home especially this year as I wrote and read affirmation notes to and from my fellow YOBBERS, a new component of this year's retreat. Small things can be so impactful.
"At Home?" at This Year's YOBBERS Retreat
“At Home?” at This Year’s YOBBERS Retreat
I continually wrestle with this dynamic in leadership of Your Other Brothers: where do I keep proper distance in the name of boundaries and self-care, and where do I let someone else enter my birdcage? Can I do both well? Can I lead and participate well?
YOB ConvoCast 094: Ryan and His Younger Brother Live Together in Their Forties
YOB ConvoCast 094: Ryan and His Younger Brother Live Together in Their Forties
Ryan makes his podcast debut as our first native Canadian on the show! He shares his unique living situation, splitting time in the big city and also a small town living in a house with his younger brother. Both Ryan and his brother are single men in their forties – Ryan, queer; his brother, straight. How did this living situation in a faraway town come to be? Ryan tells us the story about "taking the long way" one day, along with his initial visceral reaction to the notion of living with his little brother for the first time since their youth. Ryan also shares about formerly living with a boyfriend when he was affirming, and his journey beyond spiritual turmoil to telling his testimony for more people to hear!
YOB ConvoCast 093: Matt is in a Celibate Partnership
YOB ConvoCast 093: Matt Lives in a Celibate Partnership with Another Man
Newcomer to the podcast but not to our community, longtime member Matt shares about his life in a celibate partnership with another man. He talks about splitting time in two locations to be close to his parents as well as his partner, with whom he co-owns a house. He shares openly how there was never any sort of road map to this particular kind of "Side B" journey, connecting with some other celibate couples over time. Matt shares the joys of hospitality with his partner, as well as some of the challenges of celibate partnership -- namely, translating the essence of his relationship to certain audiences, including secular friends and the workplace. Matt also shares his journey of becoming Eastern Catholic, finding a home in his faith amid his celibate partnership.
YOB ConvoCast 091: Harrison Discovers More of His Masculinity with Three Children
YOB ConvoCast 091: Harrison Discovers More of His Masculinity with Three Children
Harrison returns to discuss his societally common but YOB-ly uncommon home life: a wife and three kids! He shares the joys of noise in his home, as well as the challenges of wondering whether he measures up as a dad. We learn about the farm where he grew up, including the literal closet that was once his refuge. Harrison shares vulnerably about his struggles to feel "at home" in his male body, also pointing out the beauty of Jesus' having a human body along with the Spirit's indwelling in physical bodies today. While having kids doesn’t complete a man, Harrison also shares how having children has helped him lean into more of his masculinity. Perhaps there are fatherly energies we all possess as men, even beyond having biological children?
YOB ConvoCast 089: Andrew Moved Across America for Queer Community and Home
YOB ConvoCast 089: Andrew Moved Across America for a New Home and Queer Community
Andrew returns to tell the tale of his cross-country move from Ohio to Southern California! What led him to leave the only home he’d ever known to find a new one? He shares about his upbringing in the Midwest, including many years of homeschooling, and a friend who prompted him to ponder the possibility of a new start. Andrew basks in the literal and existential sunshine of his new life in SoCal, talking about his new queer community and an accepting church that makes him feel at home in his faith and sexuality. But what of his masculinity? Where does and doesn't he feel quite "at home" in that arena?
YOB ConvoCast 087: Marshall, Single and 65, Lives on a Farm with 23 People
YOB ConvoCast 087: Marshall, Single and 65, Lives on a Farm with 23 People
We welcome back Marshall to talk more about his unique home life: a 20-acre farm, living alongside 23 people in a central house, cabins, tiny houses, and RV’s. How has Marshall enjoyed living alone in the past, and did he second-guess living with younger single men as an older single man? How did Marshall’s many living situations over six decades lead to his buying this farm, and what’s joyful and also challenging about leading such an intentional community of believers?
YOB ConvoCast 082: Tom & Daniel Pitch this Summer's First European YOBBERS Retreat!
YOB ConvoCast 082: Tom & Daniel Pitch this Summer’s First European YOBBERS Retreat!
Daniel returns to pitch this summer's special gathering of YOBBERS – in Europe! He joins Tom to discuss a smaller-scale retreat or "holiday" somewhere in the Mediterranean, inviting all who are interested to email him ASAP. Daniel also catches us up on his life in London – including the exciting news that he is now a British citizen! He tells us about one country where he's already traveled with his new passport, as well as another on the horizon to see a certain female pop star perform.
5 Times My Heart Has Swelled as a Man
5 Times My Heart Has Swelled as a Man
Once upon a time I wrote about five times I've felt like a man. As we wind down the theme of "Love Month" at YOB, I started thinking about some instances when my heart has swelled, or exploded, or some other symphonic verb meant to translate the depths of safety, care, and affection I've experienced with other men. This isn't a "top 5" or hardly exhaustive list, but these are five stories that come to mind...
>