Understanding the Male Butt Smack
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Understanding the Male Butt Smack

There we were, my friends and I, at our richest friend’s mini-mansion after church one afternoon. We were mostly college-age twenty-somethings filling up the big kitchen/living room, talking and laughing. The TV was on and snacks were on the table. It was then that I saw my chance. My friend, Bryan, stood by the island […]

Masturbation for the Married Guy
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Masturbation for the Married Guy

I’m thirty-three years old, I’m married, and I masturbate. I never thought I’d still be doing this as an adult. Back when I was a teenager, I had no intention of keeping this habit going so long. I believed masturbation was a sin back then, so I tried to stop. Of course, it was hard, […]

YOBcast Episode 022: Living Together
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YOBcast Episode 022: Living Together

Can same-sex attracted guys live together? Is there ever any physical/sexual temptation? Aren’t there at least heavy emotional issues living in the same house? Tom, Elliott, and Bradley gather to discuss one of our most often asked questions: how do you three SSA guys live together in the same house? It’s an enlightening hour of […]

It’s Okay for Men to Cry
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It’s Okay for Men to Cry

Even as I write that title, something within me questions its truth. Is it really acceptable for men to cry? American culture has told me and countless other boys and young men that crying is not manly. Men are supposed to be tough. Crying is for wimps who can’t take the pain. Caring enough to […]

YOBcast Episode 018: Sports
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YOBcast Episode 018: Sports

Some boys find success and belonging in the world of sports. Many others do not. How do our sports experiences of the past impact us today? In this episode, Tom and Elliott welcome back Bradley for a lively conversation about sports: our greatest triumphs, our worst disasters, and what it all means moving forward. As […]

Eugene Peterson, Same-Sex Marriage, and Feeling Invisible in the Church
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Eugene Peterson, Same-Sex Marriage, and Feeling Invisible in the Church

Eugene Peterson — pastor, author of The Message paraphrase Bible — recently made waves in the Christian world. First, he “affirmed” same-sex marriage, then he backtracked, still claiming to believe in “biblical marriage.” LifeWay threatened to pull his books from their stores if he didn’t align his beliefs with theirs, and a day later he did. […]

Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay
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Why I Can’t Say I’m Gay

Being an author here at YOB requires me to have homosexual attractions on some level, in some manner or another. That’s kind of our purpose here — to be men on the inside of this issue, telling stories of how we experience the world and go through life without giving in to our homosexual urges. […]

Real Men Mow Their Own Lawns
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Real Men Mow Their Own Lawns

I hate mowing my lawn. Hate it with a passion. This is not an exaggeration either. If I could, I would have solid gravel all around my house. That, or a magical lawn fairy who would keep my lawn looking pristine without my ever having to lift a finger. Since the lawn fairy still ignores […]

YOBcast Episode 016: Gay Perceptions, Part 1
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YOBcast Episode 016: Gay Perceptions, Part 1

What does it mean to “sound gay” or “look gay”? Is there anything “wrong” with our gay perceptions, should we learn to be comfortable with our gay perceptions, or should we seek to evolve beyond our gay perceptions? We’re back on track with our bimonthly podcast schedule! In the first of this two-part episode, Tom […]

The First Guy Who Ever Held My Hand
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The First Guy Who Ever Held My Hand

Years ago, back when I’d first delved into the world of online SSA friendships, I got to talking with another SSA guy in my area. We commented on each other’s blogs, we friended each other on Facebook, and we traded phone numbers, too. He intimidated me, this guy: attractive and charming and, most of all, […]