Tag: brotherhood
When I’m Attracted to Other Guys
I’ve pretty much always been attracted to guys in one manner or another. Some times more obsessively and explicitly than others. Some times more emotionally than physically. And for whatever reason, never sexually.
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How Joshua Harris’s Church Was Safe for Me
Joshua Harris pastored my church for over ten years. To our surprise, he recently announced he is divorcing his wife and and that he is no longer a Christian! Additionally, he has adopted a “Side A” gay-affirming belief. Despite all this drama and the church’s many other issues, this place has been of some help to guys dealing with same-sex attraction.
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Befriending Straight Guys: The Final Frontier
Ah, straight guys — also known as “the normal ones.” What a load of complicated feelings I have toward them. I see straight guys now and again in groups together. It evokes more of an emotional longing. A deeply profound longing. It’s a feeling of wanting to be like them, to be one of them. To be normal and accepted by ordinary men and be like ordinary men. But it can’t be that way. I’m different.
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YOBcast Episode 051: Attachment Styles
We’re diving deeper into emotional attachment with special guest, Taylor Zimmerman! Taylor’s blogged at Spiritual Friendship and spoken at Revoice. He’s a University of Chicago student currently pursuing his third (3rd!) master’s degree with interests in philosophy of religion, theology, and psychoanalysis — and how they all come together. Taylor talks to us about attachment theory and the four attachment styles: secure, ambivalent-preoccupied, dismissing-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. It’s a fascinating psychological exploration into why we attach to other men the ways we do as gay/SSA (same-sex attracted) men.
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I Just Want a Flippin Man!
It didn’t even feel like sexual lust. I just wanted intimacy. I just wanted a man. A man who will come and carry my responsibilities with me. A man who will pursue and lead me for a change. I want a man who will be there for me in everything. I want a man who will make me feel pursued, valued, and loved.
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Celebrating 3 Years on Patreon!
Today marks our third anniversary of being on Patreon! Patreon is how Your Other Brothers still exists after all these years — all thanks to monthly pledges from over 150 supporters around the world! If you believe in this work we’re doing, would you consider supporting us?
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Allowing Myself to Thrive in Missional Community
“God has placed us together for a specific reason — that the times, stories, and experiences we share are beneficial for each other,” she said. This led to discussion about how community requires vulnerability. Even with a wide open invitation, I remained a silent listener in the community.
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Saying Goodbye to Emotional Dependency — and My Best Friend
A point came in our relationship when I realized just how dependent I was on him and just how one-sided our friendship was. For my own well-being, I needed to step away from the relationship. What follows is the lament and reflection I wrote in saying “goodbye” to our friendship.
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YOBcast Episode 050: Emotional Attachment
We’re back! After a brief summer hiatus, we return with our landmark fiftieth episode. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob sharing stories of emotional attachment: the good ways we attach to other men, and the not-so-good ways we attach. It’s a callback to a previous episode on emotional dependency. We differentiate between “dependency” and “attachment” and share both our positive and negative experiences in relationship with other men.
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Straight Men are Scary
Straight men have always been scary. They’ve long been “the other,” going all the way back to first grade. We may not share the same tastes for sports and media consumption, but we still share a common masculine heart. One fraught with hauntingly familiar masculine thorns.
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