loneliness

What I Want from My Perfect Fantasy Guy
What I Want from My Perfect Fantasy Guy
Even if all the sexual stuff with men is wrong in God's eyes, I still just want to be with a man physically from time to time. Is that wrong too? Does God really care if I share my bed with another guy, as long as there's no sex?
Was He My First Childhood Crush or Something Else?
Was He My First Childhood Crush or Something Else?
It's hard to classify some of my attachments to other men as "crushes," per se. Emotional fixation is a more accurate term, I think. When I fixate on a guy, I'm not imagining him as a lover or sex partner. I'm more imagining an ideal life where he is a close friend or, yes, even a brother.
The Masculine Uncertainty of Being Uncircumcised
The Masculine Uncertainty of Being Uncircumcised
How does this "normal boy" turned "normal man" feel about his naked body? His penis? I'm still unsure of many of the answers to these questions. From the inside out, I've struggled to feel normal (comfortable) in my own skin. This masculine body. Starting with that particular appendage.
YOB ConvoCast 077: Tom & Dawson Create New Christmas Traditions!
YOB ConvoCast 077: Tom & Dawson Create New Christmas Traditions!
Dawson returns to help Tom celebrate Christmas this year! Dawson shares why he celebrates Christmas in February in addition to December, and Tom tells a Christmas tale of the first man he ever feared. We reference the "Fancy Christmas" recently spent with our YOBBERS community, including someone’s goal to appreciate Jesus’ humanity during what can be a complicated, if not lonely Christmas season.
The Anxiety for Belonging at My First YOBBERS Retreat
The Anxiety for Belonging at My First YOBBERS Retreat
On the one hand, I wanted the opportunity to meet and engage with a community whom I've deeply desired connection, and this retreat would also occur over my fall break; on the other hand, I was deeply anxious and afraid of going and then feeling isolated and alone.
Free to Be Me: A First-Time YOBBER's Retreat Experience
Free to Be Me: A First-Time YOBBER’s Retreat Experience
Something else that astonished me over the weekend was how much like myself I felt; how proud I was to be seen in the company of my fellow queer brothers; how un-worried I was about what anybody else thought. That's not like me. At least not how I have been.
Five Retreats Later and I'm All Stirred Up
Five Retreats Later and I’m Still Figuring This Out
Despite all the incredible people in our online community, I've recognized my need for more men in my city on whom I can depend. This has been a sobering searching process because YOB has become such a pillar of my identity. If I'm no longer close or as intentional with a large lot of our YOB community, who even am I?
The First Step in My Healing with Sexuality
The First Step in My Healing with Sexuality
I was just about to graduate and launch out into the world, and I couldn't hide from the truth any longer. I'm homosexual. That was the only language I had for it at the time. There was no way I could have used the word gay, because I sure wasn't happy; quite the opposite, in fact. I was devastated.
Another Sexual Addiction Begins with Pornography
Another Sexual Addiction Begins with Pornography
I found myself getting sucked into a world of fantasy. Porn was way better than watching some blockbuster: I could still be with guys without actually being with them. After all, I never cared about those guys anyway. It was all about me and getting off. The more I watched porn, the more I was hooked.
To Be in Hiding No Longer
To Be in Hiding No Longer
I was so afraid of what people thought of me that I was willing to hide who I was from family, friends, the world – and to some degree, myself. I was willing to live a life of lies to be accepted. I explained that's just how things were back then. Sadly, some people are still living this way.
>