Tag: purpose

Why Do We Follow a “Side B” Sexual Ethic?

Back in my teens, I desperately wanted to be straight. Years later, I’m less concerned about God’s changing my sexuality and more concerned about walking in thriving relationship with Christ — which also includes holiness with my sexuality. I believe what Scripture says regarding a traditional sexual ethic. But more than that, I believe in the God behind that ethic and that his Word is still good for me, even if it’s not always easy to follow.

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Do I Follow the God of Yes or the God of No?

Right on cue, in walks that cute guy again. Instantly, I’m back to spiraling, back to wondering if this faith thing can really work out in the end, or if I’m actually as crazy as I sound when I tell someone I’m pursuing celibacy. It’s in these moments that God feels like the eternal God of “no” — no sex, no boyfriend, no husband, no romance, no intimacy. No love. God becomes the God who won’t let me eat the fruit from the one tree I’m craving, instead of the God who provided an entire garden just for me.

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Celebrating 3 Years on Patreon!

Today marks our third anniversary of being on Patreon! Patreon is how Your Other Brothers still exists after all these years — all thanks to monthly pledges from over 150 supporters around the world! If you believe in this work we’re doing, would you consider supporting us?

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Running from the Call to Come Out

When the call came, it wasn’t that I couldn’t hear it; it was that I had no interest in obeying. For Jonah, that call was Nineveh. For me? It was coming out. My “solution” for my sexuality was quite simple: I’d tell no one, become straight, and then move on with my life. A secret I’d die keeping rather than ever share; I could hardly admit it to myself, let alone another human.

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Called Out by My Best Friend

We hadn’t seen each other in a while, so we caught up on each other’s lives. Then came the confrontation. The tone changed, and he wanted to get some stuff off his chest. He told me he didn’t appreciate my butting in on their relationship and trying to save our friendship. That if he had to choose between our friendship or his girlfriend, he’d choose her.

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Finding Humility Through Beauty at the YOBBERS Retreat

Humility is not about being hard on yourself; it’s about fighting the urge to stand at the center of it all. As I stood there at this year’s YOBBERS retreat, an observer rather than a participant, God reminded me I wasn’t there to get as much as I could get, or even give as much as I could give. The YOBBERS retreat was bigger than me. I didn’t need to stand in the center of anything.

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My Sexuality is a Gift from God

God could have prevented my attraction to men. Whatever your beliefs on causation, I believe God is powerful enough to have adjusted whatever needed adjusting to have prevented my attraction to men. Since this did not happen, I can only determine one reasonable possibility: my sexuality was something God wanted for my life. Therefore, I see it as a gift.

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