My Straight Friend Won’t Touch Me

He was never physically affectionate; we’d never even hugged. I wanted to touch him not out of a sexual desire but from a longing to connect with him as love with a brother. I dreamed of a day when we could embrace and confess our brotherly love for each other. I put my hand on his shoulder once. He brushed it off.

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YOBcast Episode 033: Marriage, Another Story

Sometimes a marriage falls apart. We tell another story of “mixed-orientation” marriage as Elliott’s friend, John, talks about his unique upbringing in Japan, his time as an openly gay man at a Christian college, his sexual encounters with men and women, and ultimately a marriage that led to children and heartbreak.

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Finding Your Brotherhood

In this episode, Tom dives into the third of our five YOB values — brotherhood. In brotherhood, we learn to share our burdens with one another and bond in the two ways Jesus demonstrated — the being and the doing. Tom talks his childhood yearnings for brotherhood and how this longing has translated to the present day.

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The Art of Communicating a Love Language

My second greatest “love language” is quality time. I communicate and receive love simply by being physically present with someone. We can be silent for hours — but if we are “intentionally” together, then I perceive it as a sign of care and love. I wasn’t here for him; I was here for me.

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YOBcast Episode 032: Marriage

Is opposite-sex marriage a feasible path for guys with same-sex attraction? Tom and Elliott welcome back Corey and his wife, Kate. We talk the ins and outs of their “mixed orientation” marriage. Their high school romance. Their engagement. Their wedding night. Their journey to conferences. Their marriage.

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When a Friendship Gets Tested

All these ups and downs often caused me emotional pain. I had to take risks rather than stay safe and comfortable. My SSA made me feel weak and ineffective around all these straight guys. These painful things tested my friendship with James, too.

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When I Felt Like a Total Failure

What I thought was a total “God thing” to help me through my life and financial crisis ended up being a big flop. I felt like a total failure, my mind reminded by all the stuff I’d endured when told I couldn’t become a leader because of my past. I had to deal with that nightmare once again.

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YOBcast Episode 030: Physical Touch, Part 2

Tom and Elliott welcome back Bradley for the continuation of our physical touch podcast — along with a very special guest! We talk about the perception of touch in America versus touch around the world, and we dive into touch as babies to touch as older men. Why is touch — and lack thereof — so critical?

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