friendship

The First Guy Who Ever Crossed Physical Boundaries With Me
The First Guy Who Ever Crossed Physical Boundaries With Me
Somewhere in the night, the role reversal from cuddling with Brandon completed itself. Lines got blurred and then definitively crossed. It wasn't sexual touch, but it was inappropriate touch. It wasn't welcomed or invited. Brett didn't ask; he just did. He took. Just as I took from Brandon, Brett took from me. And passive, conflict-avoidant me felt crippled to say a word against
Your Other Brothers ConvoCast • 030
YOB ConvoCast 030: Tom & Matt Process Grief
Tom welcomes back longtime YOB blogger, podcaster, and resident "sexpert" Matt for a deep dive into death, grief, and how these difficult seasons either shape us or harden us. They also give some love to fellow YOB brother Dean, the bizarre adult playground-museum that is Meow Wolf, and Tom's (almost 40-year-old)
Your Other Brothers Podcast | 079
The YOBcast 079: Love Languages & Sexuality
How does our sexuality impact the way we give and receive love from others, particularly other men? Why do quality time and physical touch rank high in our community? And where is the line between expressing the love we need and manipulating others with our love language of choice? Join Tom, Ryan, and Aaron as we examine the five languages like never before through the lens of our sexuality: acts of service, gifts, words of affirmation, quality time, and physical
Your Other Brothers ConvoCast • 028
The YOB ConvoCast 028: Tom & Eugene Go to Cuddle Corner!
Tom welcomes back YOB’s resident artist and cuddling aficionado, Eugene, for a discussion on physical boundaries between friends. They reference both Tom’s latest blog on crossing boundaries and Eugene’s latest blog on the nature vs. nurture debate! Additionally, Tom reveals some behind the scenes magic for rectifying the technical snafu that happened during last year’s ConvoCast recording with Eugene. And the guys bounce around a new name for what to call someone who isn’t quite a YOBBER
The First Guy I Ever Crossed Physical Boundaries With
The First Guy I Ever Crossed Physical Boundaries With
I pictured him crying in his bed when he woke up that morning, or even going to bed crying right after leaving me; knowing I'd hurt him, knowing I'd been the one to cross physical boundaries. It destroyed me, if I'm
Coming Out to My Church Small Group
Coming Out to My Church Small Group
I'd spent a long time laboriously looking for a community to belong, and I'd finally found one. With this new community, though, came a growing fear – the fear of eventually being rejected. If they knew me, like really knew me, would they still want to be friends with me or even associate with me at all? If these people were to reject me for my sexuality, I thought, it would be better to experience that rejection now by just ripping off the bandage rather than going deeper into relationships that would only be taken away
When I Get Lost in My Loneliness
When I Get Lost in My Loneliness
Well, 2020 happened. And in this "unprecedented" year, a more personal disease revealed itself in me. Like Nouwen wrote, despite my being around people during a pandemic, I faced loneliness. My tendency to isolate combined with an actual, physical inability to connect with others made me look deeper into the why of my
This Yearning for Men
This Yearning for Men
We yearn for men. We yearn for specific men. We yearn for abstract, unspecified men. We yearn for men in general. We yearn for men to yearn for other men. Sometimes we yearn for men's bodies, sometimes for their hearts, sometimes for their souls. We yearn for brothers. We yearn for boyfriends or husbands. Some of us yearn for fathers, some of us yearn for sons. We yearn to encounter, to access, and to drink deeply of the raw, earthy-sweet, intoxicating, powerful substance of masculinity. To be welcomed into it, to be wanted into
I Suck at Self-Control
I Suck at Self-Control
My issues with self-control go well beyond the typical desires of hunger, attraction, sleep, and so on. It goes into my struggle to pause before acting – at
The YOBcast 071: Intentional Community w/ Pieter Valk
Pieter Valk joins us for a discussion on monastic or intentional community, with particular regard to his Nashville Family of Brothers. We talk about the logistics of living under one roof with fellow single celibate male believers, not just for a season or two, but for the long haul. Through every
>