When Self-Reliance Was My Norm
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When Self-Reliance Was My Norm

Honestly, I would rather not go back to middle school — but telling my story necessitates that we journey back to those days. I’m in eighth grade. Academia and band consume most of my time and thoughts. I’m not competitive and find gym class … uncomfortable. So, I stick to what I know: books, formulas, […]

Understanding the Male Butt Smack
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Understanding the Male Butt Smack

There we were, my friends and I, at our richest friend’s mini-mansion after church one afternoon. We were mostly college-age twenty-somethings filling up the big kitchen/living room, talking and laughing. The TV was on and snacks were on the table. It was then that I saw my chance. My friend, Bryan, stood by the island […]

My Straight Friend Was Emotionally Dependent on Me
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My Straight Friend Was Emotionally Dependent on Me

Emotional dependency. Such a fun topic. Many of us SSA (same-sex attracted) brothers know the terminology all too well. We long for human connection with our gender. We feel like no other man understands us. 

No one wants to be near us. No one wants to know us. No one wants to be our friend. […]

YOBcast Episode 018: Sports
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YOBcast Episode 018: Sports

Some boys find success and belonging in the world of sports. Many others do not. How do our sports experiences of the past impact us today? In this episode, Tom and Elliott welcome back Bradley for a lively conversation about sports: our greatest triumphs, our worst disasters, and what it all means moving forward. As […]

Discovering the Heart of My Nudist Desires
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Discovering the Heart of My Nudist Desires

In the first installment of this series, I described the beginnings of my long and complicated relationship with nudity. Entering high school, my love/hate relationship with nudity became more complicated . . . I grew fascinated by the thought of naked men and being naked with them but also terrified at the same time. My […]

To Love A Woman
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To Love A Woman

“Are you dating anyone?” “Are there any girls you’re interested in?” “Who’s got your attention?” These questions were often asked of me in high school. Though I was very aware that guys in their teens were supposed to be interested in the female species, I was hardly conscious of them. I pretended to be fascinated by […]

Banned from Youth Ministry
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Banned from Youth Ministry

Back before my whole church ordeal started, before being told I couldn’t lead in any ministry, I was already heavily involved in my church. I took part in the college-age ministry, I attended the main church campus for awesome Bible teaching, and I served the best way I could in whatever area needed. A few weeks before I applied for SOM and leadership for […]

Keeping Healthy Boundaries with Another SSA Guy
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Keeping Healthy Boundaries with Another SSA Guy

This is Part 1 in my series about my friendship with Jeremy. Check out Part 2 and Part 3. I’ve told my stories of friendship with my gay brother, Brad, and my straight friend, Brandon. I will continue my stories on friendship by telling another about my long-time friend, Jeremy, who also deals with same-sex attraction (SSA). When I joined the church […]

YOBcast Episode 003: Digging Deeper with Tom & Elliott
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YOBcast Episode 003: Digging Deeper with Tom & Elliott

PODCAST WEEK continues on our blog with Episode 003! In this episode, Tom and Elliott interview each other about family and friendship, childhood and adulthood, and their respective faiths. It’s a chance for you to dive deeper into their stories beyond the blog. You can subscribe to our show on iTunes or Stitcher for notifications every time […]