I knew I needed a miracle even to get out there, and now this triggering text message was stuck in my brain as I got ready. I packed my clothes for the weekend but needed to get some food in my stomach before the semi-long trip.
It's October 11, National Coming Out Day. Over the years, countless individuals, young and old, have taken to YouTube, Facebook, the Internet, and face-to-face relationships to finally reveal their sexuality this month. Coming out is a pivotal moment in any gay or SSA (same-sex attracted) person's journey, and we gathered our featured authors together for a conversation on our own coming out experiences this Coming Out Month.
It's National Coming Out Month. For this month's MANLY MONDAY, Tom takes a look at the hunchbacked woman of Luke 13, relating her 18-year story to his own 19-year journey of coming out and finally bringing the dark below to light.
It's our premiere episode of "State of the YOB," a recap of last month's blogs, podcasts, and video as I also bid a fond farewell to a dear, zero-legged friend.
Arriving at my new house, I found no one there to greet me. I knew where my new housemates hid the key, so I let myself in. My emotions were almost more than I could take: fear, loneliness, and confusion.
Why do we choose a traditional, "Side B" sexual ethic as men who follow Jesus? Do we choose this life solely for our convictions or in spite of them? Do we live out a gay/SSA celibate life with joy or in angst and suffering? Tom welcomes Ryan and Matt for a discussion on why we're Side B, as opposed to "Side A" (gay-affirming), and where these labels even come from.
We finished the day by taking silhouette pictures with the blazing orange-and-pink sky as our backdrop. My siblings lovingly kissed their spouses and lifted them up in the air as some of the most romantic and precious images I'd ever witnessed. I stayed to watch for a little while, knowing that no one would ask me if I wanted any pictures by myself. That would have been absurd, right? It didn't take long for me to reach the end of what I could handle with my family. So, I ran away.
Change happens to all of us. Relational change. Spiritual change. Seasons of life that take us to the redemptive mountaintops and valleys of shadows. Tom welcomes Ryan and Dean for our first episode back after a monthlong hiatus. It's an episode of literal change with new sounds, new segments, and new features as we dive into a discussion on the most pivotal changes in our lives. We discuss our authors' retreat weekend, the inaugural Revoice conference, our first 1-star iTunes review, Tom's initial discovery of this Your Other Brothers community, Ryan's journey with body image, Dean's friendship with Tom's younger brother, and more.
I wasn't sure what to say. I couldn't get a feel for how my friend felt. Was he upset, angry, weirded out, touched, happy, confused? Henry gave no clue to his thoughts. Only one emotion registered in my own gut: fear. Months prior . . . The first few weeks after Henry left our church were actually harder than I expected. Entering the office each day, I caught myself instinctually looking at his desk to say hello. I found myself wanting to turn around to chat with him about the latest blog I'd just read. I began to feel an ache around the time each day when we used to go away from our desks to read the Bible together and check in with each other. I wanted to fill Henry's absence -- but my options were nonexistent. For one, I was now the only guy in my office suite....
I hated being the awkward, quiet introvert; I wanted to be like the energetic, chatty, extroverted kids. They always seemed to make a bajillion friends and were always the life of the party who people laughed at and enjoyed. I hated myself for not having charisma or speaking when it mattered. I thought something was wrong with me.