growth

Your Other Brothers Podcast | 095: The Enneagram
YOBcast 095: The Enneagram
We’ve referenced it again and again for dozens of episodes, and now we’re finally devoting an entire episode to the Enneagram! We open up the Enneagram box and share what we’ve found helpful for our personal growth in this trendy personality system. How does the Enneagram impact our self-awareness? And how does this self-awareness impact our view of others? Join Tom, Ryan, and Ben for an overview of the Enneagram! We dive into the stats of all the types in our community and share a little about our own types. And get ready for the YOB ConvoCast summer series to come, featuring discussions with each of the nine types in our
Loved by God – Even When I Can't Relate
Loved by God – Even When I Can’t Relate
Who am I? This could be a question for self-edification or self-deprecation. A question answered with set shoulders and proud confidence, or a rhetorical question asked to oneself at the depths of loneliness and despair. The best way I have determined to answer that question is I am...loved by
The First Guy I Fell In Love With, and the Path Forward with Touch
The First Guy I Fell In Love With, and the Path Forward with Touch
He's the guy who has clarified my boundaries with cuddling and physical touch more than any other. The guy from whom I've sought comfort in touch more than any other. The guy who has made me feel seen and warm and laugh and cry like no other. He's the first (and to this point, only) guy I've fallen in love
Adrift as a Child or a Man
Adrift as a Child or a Man
I still have that Link costume somewhere in my closet. Perhaps it's the wandering through the woods that I love, the isolation, the music; or, perhaps it's something deeper that has stuck with me after all these years. Perhaps it's that I feel like the protagonist: adrift in time, unsure whether I'm a child or a man. This is how I feel as I move back into my childhood bedroom – the place where my sexual trauma
Your Other Brothers Podcast | 094: Lent & Sexuality
YOBcast 094: Lent & Sexuality
It’s the sequel to Advent & Sexuality that nobody asked for! But here we are talking about Lent, this broader concept of sacrifice, and how this particular season ties together with our sexuality. Because where else can you get that kind of podcast content? Join Tom and the "Holy Crew" of Pastors Ben and Will for a discussion on the Lenten season in our last podcast before our virtual retreat later this month! Join us, won't
Your Other Brothers Podcast | 092: Second Adolescence
YOBcast 092: Second Adolescence
Many gay or SSA folks experience a delayed or second adolescence in adulthood after keeping our sexuality secret in our first adolescence when we unconsciously adapted to the heteronormative culture around us. When we finally do find safe masculine circles, whether within YOB or elsewhere, conversational topics like sex or masturbation, or shared male experiences like nudity and cuddling hold great appeal – if not laced with some of that adolescent immaturity or a tinge (or bucketload) of
What Masculine Strength Looks Like
What Masculine Strength Looks Like
Does nice equal good? Does strong equal toxic? Commiseration is a drink that intoxicates quickly, yet we must weep with those who weep. Am I a man? Am I strong? What am I, and where is my place? What is the nature of masculine
Your Other Brothers ConvoCast • 040
YOB ConvoCast 040: Tom & Marshall Buy the Field! (and the Puppies!)
Tom welcomes back Marshall to catch us up on his pandemic-induced overworked, yet puppy-filled life on the farm! He shares what he has always enjoyed about our YOBBERS retreats and gives some context to his "bought the field" Xanga blog username of yesteryear. Finally, Marshall shares about one of his longtime single friends, now dating a girl, and the joy he finds as a "friend of the
Repurposing My Church Angst
Repurposing My Angst with the Church
While I have had many wonderful, supportive Christians in my life, I find many more who just do not want to meet me where I am with my sexuality. This is not a childish lament about how life is not fair or how people in the Church have the audacity to disagree with some of my thoughts or opinions. No, this is an honest observation that the Church has done and continues to do a poor job of helping gay or same-sex attracted Christians continue to walk in their faith with Christ. Instead of being a great cloud of witnesses encouraging me onward, some act as a voice of the enemy telling me I have no place at God's
You Need to Do Better
You Need to Do Better
Living this life means recognizing that there are some hard elements to this journey – some of which may always be hard. If I can't make these things any less hard, then I need to have tools to stand up and continue forward, learning, growing, and changing, rather than get beaten down, stagnate, and cease to grow. I need methods to find peace and joy, even in pain. In my last post I said that my answer to thriving begins in Jesus, and I would add that it continues with Jesus as I work through the areas of my life that need attention, healing, growth, and change. In short, I needed to do
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