We Need to Get Over Same-Sex Attraction Already
Same-sex attraction is not the only thing. It’s not the only struggle. And I can’t tell you the freedom I experienced when I realized homosexuality was actually not even close to the top of my human struggle pyramid.
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Coming Out to My Family Like a Hit-and-Run
I would be coming out to my family over dinner. I told them that I wasn’t planning on changing the course of my faith. I explained that I was telling them because I planned to tell even more people. I told them that if I wanted to talk about it again I’d be the one to bring it up, and I stood up and left.
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We Must Take Courage
In this episode of Manly Monday, Tom dives into the fourth of our five YOB values — courage. A value that goes hand-in-hand with our final value, vulnerability. In order to embrace vulnerability, however, one must first take courage. Watch as Tom talks about rollercoasters, public speaking, and Holy Spirit promptings.
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My Straight Friend Won’t Touch Me
He was never physically affectionate; we’d never even hugged. I wanted to touch him not out of a sexual desire but from a longing to connect with him as love with a brother. I dreamed of a day when we could embrace and confess our brotherly love for each other. I put my hand on his shoulder once. He brushed it off.
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The Answer to My Own Prayers
What would it look like for my distant tribe to be gathered together? Didn’t God long to change our shame into praise and renown? “Gather us,” I prayed. I prayed that my scattered and lost tribe would be drawn together, our fortunes restored before our eyes. It was a prayer for my own benefit, but also for all of us.
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When a Friendship Gets Tested
All these ups and downs often caused me emotional pain. I had to take risks rather than stay safe and comfortable. My SSA made me feel weak and ineffective around all these straight guys. These painful things tested my friendship with James, too.
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I Define My Gender Identity
I’d transition to being a woman. I’d find a man to love me for who I was, and I’d become his wife. I’d run away with him and find freedom to be the woman I was supposed to be. This is not what happened, of course. Some would call it a mercy; others, a tragedy. I call it taking ownership of my gender identity.
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The Fetish I Can’t Talk About
I have a fetish, and I’ve had one for about as long as I can remember. I have a “thing” that, in itself, isn’t quite sexual in nature. But I fetishize that thing. I idolize it a lot, fantasizing for this thing, turning what was never meant to be sexualized on a dial that was never meant to be dialed.
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I Used to Hate Gay People
I couldn’t be like these people. They seemed like the antithesis of everything I stood for. Finding out that the Bible forbade homosexual sex only fueled my self-righteous anger. To assert my masculinity and avoid being labeled gay at all costs, I joined my other straight male classmates in mocking gay people.
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A Man Who Falls Seven Times
Welcome to our second episode of Manly Monday! In this episode, Tom talks about his experience at a faith and sexuality conference, including a man who falls seven times — and what happens to him after the seventh fall.
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