Tag: growth
Why I’m Attracted to Other Guys (and Who Cares?)
by Thomas Mark Zuniga | Oct 30, 2019 | Lifestories, Popular | 48
I’ve had at least a decade to process my sexuality, why certain men “do it” for me and why others do not. I’ve already written about what kinds of guys I’m attracted to and my cycles of physical and emotional same-sex attraction. But am I sexually attracted to men? The answer has become so clear over the last couple years: no.
Read MoreWhat Happened After Coming Out at My Christian Camp
by Kevin Zimmerman | Oct 16, 2019 | Lifestories | 22
One night, I had a sexual dream about one of the male cabin leaders. I didn’t want my past to ruin the summer and my connections with the other male staff. On several previous occasions, telling my story had helped me break down some of the awkwardness I felt. So, I grabbed the cabin leader supervisor and shared my story with him.
Read MoreI Still Struggle to be Vulnerable
by Dean "M" Samuels | Oct 8, 2019 | Lifestories | 14
The seemingly deepest parts of my life are on display for the world to see. And yet there are a few things that I keep close — secret — from those closest to me. Because I am afraid of being vulnerable with them. I’m not talking about “coming out” — I’m talking about the matters at my very core that influence my actions in ways few could ever imagine.
Read MoreAllowing Myself to Thrive in Missional Community
by Kevin Zimmerman | Aug 20, 2019 | Lifestories | 13
“God has placed us together for a specific reason — that the times, stories, and experiences we share are beneficial for each other,” she said. This led to discussion about how community requires vulnerability. Even with a wide open invitation, I remained a silent listener in the community.
Read MoreSelf-Hatred and the Struggles of Being Gay
by Will Cooper | Aug 16, 2019 | Lifestories | 16
As a kid, I said a lot of derogatory things about LGBTQ+ people. I cringe at the things I remember saying. When I realized I was gay, all of that hatred that I showed to others turned in on myself. That realization drove me to reparative therapy. The logic makes sense: I hate gay people, I am gay — thus, I need to not be gay.
Read MoreHere and Queer: Redeeming My Sexual and Gender Identity
by Dean "M" Samuels | Aug 13, 2019 | Lifestories | 14
I’m queer. That is how I now identify my sexuality. And it’s how I can best define my experience of gender, too. In my pursuit to grow more like Christ, I was setting aside part of my life as a mystery spot. How could I submit my sexuality to Christ if I didn’t even know what it was?
Read MoreSaying Goodbye to Emotional Dependency — and My Best Friend
by Ben Rutkowski | Aug 9, 2019 | Lifestories | 39
A point came in our relationship when I realized just how dependent I was on him and just how one-sided our friendship was. For my own well-being, I needed to step away from the relationship. What follows is the lament and reflection I wrote in saying “goodbye” to our friendship.
Read MoreYOBcast Episode 050: Emotional Attachment
We’re back! After a brief summer hiatus, we return with our landmark fiftieth episode. Join Tom, Ryan, and Jacob sharing stories of emotional attachment: the good ways we attach to other men, and the not-so-good ways we attach. It’s a callback to a previous episode on emotional dependency. We differentiate between “dependency” and “attachment” and share both our positive and negative experiences in relationship with other men.
Read MoreStraight Men are Scary
by Thomas Mark Zuniga | Jul 31, 2019 | Lifestories | 31
Straight men have always been scary. They’ve long been “the other,” going all the way back to first grade. We may not share the same tastes for sports and media consumption, but we still share a common masculine heart. One fraught with hauntingly familiar masculine thorns.
Read MoreIs Being “Side B” Just Internalized Homophobia?
by Eugene Heffron | Jul 23, 2019 | Lifestories | 23
Do I live the way I live purely because of the way I was raised? Do I still harbor any internalized homophobia of myself and others? Is that why I’m “Side B”? Is this all coming from a place of pious self-righteousness?
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