Tag: growth
Deciding to Love Others More Affectionately
In the year of our Lord two thousand and nineteen, a fun idea came to mind. Instead of coming up with a new year’s resolution that would require me to exert some striving effort or discipline, I thought of a fun goal for the year instead. I wrote something in my prayer journal; it’s a prayer that became my goal for the year. But what did “To love more affectionately and not robotically” actually mean?
Read More
Do I Still Pray the Gay Away?
When they hear I’m attracted to men but married to a woman, straight people, particularly Christians, sometimes ask if I expect my attractions to “change” in this life. For the longest time, I prayed for God to change my attractions. To make me straight. I do still pray about my sexuality, but I don’t pray that God would change my attractions to heterosexual.
Read More
YOBcast Episode 057: Gay Sex and Hookups
What led to your having gay sex for the first time? Can you separate the physical from the emotional in gay sex? How many times have you had gay sex, and would you consider yourself a sex addict? It’s a throwback episode with three of our original YOB cofounders: Tom, Dean, and Matt. We talk with Matt about his journey and struggles with gay sex and hookups. It’s a raw, courageous chronicling of his story as a pastor’s kid – a story still being written to this day. We also catch up with Dean and Matt from the last year or so, including Dean’s recent exploits to Canada (and questionable Canadian accent) and Matt’s sarcastic sense of humor (or actual disappointment) with Tom…
Read More
We Have a Brand New Logo! (And Website.)
For the last year, our website has been in a state of transition. We’re still tinkering with various pages and features, but the bulk of our third redesign in five years just happened with a brand new header, logo, and color scheme! A huge shout-out to Wesley Ayers for his hard work in designing our new look. As to the brand new header, here’s what it all means…
Read More
What is Love as a Queer Man?
As a queer man, why would a loving God permit me to desire that from which I should abstain? Why allow me as a young boy to be so abused as to feel unsafe as a boy and retreat to dreaming of being a girl? How could God, in infinite and perfect love, let my will so rebel against His holiness? And how on earth do I demonstrate that love?
Read More
YOBcast Episode 055: Mentors
In the spirit of resolutions, self-improvement, and growth in this new year, we’re talking about mentors: those wise, sage-like figures who guide us through this life. Tom, Ryan, and Jacob talk about their favorite mentors in books and movies, sharing some of their own mentorship experiences from years past. What qualities do all these figures share in common? We also discuss the concept of mentoring a new generation — including whether we feel we’re even capable of such a thing. It’s an awesome kickstart to a new year and a new decade as we recommit to producing two podcast episodes per month!
Read More
Fruit of the Spirit: A Queer Man’s Journey for 2020
My queerness is a part of me. And my desire is to submit my whole self to Christ. Thus, why would I not hold up my sexuality to the fruit of the Spirit to test it? Perhaps I may see where my sexuality rails against the Spirit. Or perhaps I may see where the Spirit shines its attributes through my queer identity.
Read More
Naked and Unashamed in the Locker Room
For the longest time I felt afraid about the locker room setting. Part of my fear and shame came from body-image issues, as I was the “fat kid” most of my life. Part of my fear also came from my same-sex attraction – the fear for potential arousal. I was curious how the other guys looked but also ashamed and scared to be around them or be seen in my nakedness.
Read More
I’m Just Not That Into Physical Touch Anymore
I actually find myself decreasingly needing — or even desiring — touch with other men. It’s not completely gone, mind you. But the need/desire is considerably less. This is a fairly new development. I’m still unpacking the reasons, but I have some theories based on how my male friendships have transpired the last decade — many of them imploding.
Read More
Why I’m Attracted to Other Guys (and Who Cares?)
I’ve had at least a decade to process my sexuality, why certain men “do it” for me and why others do not. I’ve already written about what kinds of guys I’m attracted to and my cycles of physical and emotional same-sex attraction. But am I sexually attracted to men? The answer has become so clear over the last couple years: no.
Read More
Trending Posts
Authors & Contributors
Recent Comments